This week I’m turning my attention to the penis, that anatomical piece of flesh that can change the way the world sees and treats you. I know there are many more differences between the sexes but it’s the penis that has always stood out for me.
When babies are made they are sexless and only develop their genitalia a couple of weeks into the development process. After that gender is sealed and when that bundle of joy arrives and a baby boy is born the penis is usually celebrated – the vagina, not so much!
Men love their penises. They talk about them all the time. One could say that the penis and the ego are one. They LOVE them. They touch them, scratch them and readjust them on a whim and I have never met a man who didn’t think that his penis was the answer to every woman’s sexual frustration.
But nobody really talks about the penis and its issues. I know because after 15 years of Lola Montez I know the whispers and questions that get asked in hushed tones. Men have insecurities about this the most hallowed of body parts and most don’t know where to go to ask and would literally rather die than admit they have a problem.
Let’s start with the number one obsession, penis size. The average penis is 3 to 4 inches when flaccid and 5 to 6 inches when erect. The size in its flaccid state has very little to do with its erect state. So for those of you comparing yourselves with the well hung horse in the gym change room, stop it! You are probably about the same size when you get ready for sex, unless you really do have a micro penis.
A micro penis is defined as a penis when fully erect is no more than 2.5 inches. How you manage a micro penis is an article all on its own.
A penis can be made bigger (by less than 1 inch) through long term traction and a bit more through surgery. A quick solution is to use a penis sleeve that can add both length and girth.
Not all erections are equal and they can be graded. Your erection hardness is a very accurate guide to your overall physical health. If you think you have a problem, see your doctor immediately.
The penis, especially an uncircumcised penis has its own ecosystem with a whole host of bacteria breeding in all the wrong places. Research has shown that circumcision can help reduce STDs and HIV. Research also shows that there is less cervical cancer in communities where men are circumcised.
Most penises curve one way or the other. Too much curve can be extremely painful and is an actual physical condition known as Peyronie’s Disease. It can be treated, from what I understand it does require surgery.
The penis is as sensitive as female genitalia, especially the frenulum. Unfortunately sensitivity can decrease with age. The good news is that vibrators can work on penises to. It’s sexy and sensual, but even if a man has a spinal cord injury, with the use of a vibrator, he is able to have an orgasm.
Although the penis is not a bone, it hardens because of blood flowing into the fibrous tissue it is made up of, it can break! Those unfortunate souls who have experienced it, report a loud popping sound followed by extreme pain. It can happen through vigorous sex but most reported cases are because of vigorous masturbation! If it happens to you, despite being embarrassed, you have to have it seen to immediately or you can cause permanent damage that can lead to erectile dysfunction.
Speaking of ED, smoking isn’t just bad for your lungs but it can also have a significant impact on the penis and the strength of erections. Because smoking clogs the arteries, a smoker could have a harder time rising to the occasion. Best reason ever to stop.
Regular blood flow to the penis is an important part of keeping it healthy. Researchers believe that the body automatically knows this and sends electric impulses to the genital area during REM sleep. Hello Morning Glory!
My favourite bit of information about the penis is that less than 6% of men actually need extra large condoms. The other 94% are lying.
And on that shocking note, stay safe and have great sex. If you have any questions or comments email me – Sharon@lolamontez.co.za
3 Comments
Your article was very reassuring because I am not the biggest guy in town and sometime you feel a bit strange seeing big penis in change room. You wonder if you are normal…
I never measured my private part because my wife never complained and she is happy with my performances and also the care I take to make sure she is satisfied.
Lately I can not sustained and erection and I loose the stiffness after a couple of minutes, do you think one of the pump you are advertising will assist? I don’t want to take pills because I am a bit afraid of the side effects…
I HAVE BEEN READING YOUR ” PLAY TOGETHER ” COLUMN IN THE SATURDAY STAR EVERY WEEK SINCE YOU STARTED TO WRITE THEM . THEY ARE VERY INTERESTING AND I ENJOY READING THEM . I THINK I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU TO COMMENT ABOUT : CIRCUMCISION .
I THINK IT IS THE INALIENABLE RIGHT OF ANY MAN TO DECIDE BY HIMSELF , AFTER REACHING ADULTHOOD , IF TO BECOME CIRCUMCISED OR NOT . NOBODY , NOT EVEN HIS PARENTS , SHOULD IMPOSE IT ON ANYBODY . THE BIBLICAL ” OUR FATHER ABRAHAM ” WAS APPARENTLY THE INVENTOR OF THIS PROCEDURE.
HE DID IT ON HIMSELF WHEN HE WAS AN OLD MAN . THE REASON : IT ENHANCES ERECTIONS . CIRCUMCISION CAN BE DONE AT ANY AGE BUT IT SHORTENS THE PENIS BY ABOUT 3 CENTIMETERS , WHEN ERECT . THIS IS NOT A PROBLEM FOR A MAN WITH A BIG PENIS BUT IT IS FOR A MAN WITH A SMALL PENIS . LIFE
WITH A SMALL PENIS [ OR SMALL BOOBS FOR A WOMAN ] IS NOT EASY BUT LIFE IS NEVER EASY .
Dear Johnny,
This reply is about 4 years too late but I’ll leave a reply anyway. In my opinion way less women are obsessed about their boob size than men are with their penis size. I think most men are also actually more obsessed with women’s boob sizes and it isn’t so much the women that are too bothered by it, and if they are it is probably because the hype men and the porn industry are making out of it. Same goes for penis size and the hype surrounding it. I don’t think something as trivial as boob size are making womens lives ‘harder’, we are more than our boobs anyway. Small boobs however does not have a physical issue/influence on sexual intercourse but a small penis might obviously be a bit problematic. However chin up guys, life need not be so hard with a small penis, there are various ways and practises to have mindblowing sex (even without a penis at all), and luckily life also offers other beautiful experiences without getting a penis involved – like swimming in the ocean on a hot summers day (swimming requires only arms and legs and nothing inbetween), eating a delicious hot crumbly apple pie with fresh dollop of cream (do not get American Pie masturbation ideas). Point is- life is an oyster, forget a bit about your penis and lick out the oyster.